venting

Okay, so this is about me and not Porter and Dallin. I went to a women lawyers thing today where we discussed how women get ahead, etc. The topics are a little played out but still interesting to discuss.
Anyway, a number of women expressed frustration that male lawyers, etc. openly ask how women with children will be able to devote the necessary time to the practice, etc. Some questions are friendly and not intended to offend, they are simply asked for curiosity's sake or out of actual compassion for the mother/lawyer. Other questions/questioners are more malicious and intended to make the woman feel inadequate. These women then discussed how women lawyers can have it all, how you can still put in the necessary time and effort and still have children. Underlying all of this though was how it is necessary to have either a very supportive spouse or a good nanny or both.
Although I appreciate the strides that other women have made in this field and their efforts to strike a balance, I am still left feeling unsatisfied. I told a friend of mine, who was in charge of this event that I still feel like there isn't a place for women like me to excel in the legal profession. Someone who wants to work but doesn't want to sacrifice raising her children for a career. I feel like I benefit a great deal from working, learning, etc. but I would be happy to work part time. My friend said that my place is where I am. Sure I have found a job and, don't get me wrong it a good job and I often enjoy it, but it is not the career path I had planned for myself. I don't really have the opportunity to advance, I don't get the legal speciality that Iwould like (or any speciality for that matter), I don't make much money (which is not the most important thing to me, but still. . . ). The path that Iwould like to follow isn't an option for me because in private or even public practice it is still basically unheard of to only work 40 hours a week, much less work some of those hours at home. The few times I have decided to try to find a different job, I hit the same roadblocks, that I am not willing to work the schedule that would be required.
I am feeling a little lost right now. I feel like, even in trying to be a good mom, I am still short changing my kids and it is all for naught because I am also short changing my career. This is why I try not to hang out with other lawyers too much, it always starts me on this little spiral of negative thinking. I will try to remember that I everyone makes compromises and at least I don't feel like I have totally compromised the things that are important to me. Okay. Enough of this.