on and on

Joe's efforts to try to get Porter to ride the bike have intensified. Joe bought "himself" a batman motorcycle that Porter will be allowed to play with if he rides the bike. Porter has been hardcore coveting the motorcycle but still will not ride his bike. Joe bought the motorcycle yesterday and Porter got it out of the bag in the car and started to open it to "help" Joe so that he would be able to open it easier when he got home. Joe took it away. Joe put it on top of the fridge, still in its packaging. This morning, Joe got up early and went to the gym. Porter got up about 10 minutes later and said that he would be just play with Dad's motorcycle while Dad was at work. He went out and found it still on top of the fridge. He asked if I would get it down. I said I couldn't because it was Dad's. Porter told me to go back to sleep and then he went out and got a chair and pulled the motorcycle down. I caught him and he said that he was just looking at it and wouldn't open it. All morning Porter tried to think of ways to open the motorcycle without me knowing. He said he wanted to get dressed in Dallin's room and he wanted me to cover my ears while I did it. When that didn't work, he tried to take the motorcycle to the bathroom so that Batman could watch him use the potty. Finally, when Dallin woke up Porter tried to hide in his room to open the motorcycle while I was changing Dallin. At one point, Porter came running out of his room to tell me that I might of thought that I heard the motorcycle opening but it wasn't. I said I would just go check and he ran down the hallway screaming that he hadn't opened it and threw himself on top of the motorcycle. When I got the motorcycle away and put it back on top of the fridge, Porter cried loudly for about a half an hour. Even after all that, he still doesn't want to ride his bike. I don't know what Joe will resort to next. The harder he pushes, the more resistant Porter becomes.

Joe is playing some kind of zombie shooting game on the X-box right now. He has tried to teach Porter how to play and Porter can't figure out the controller. Instead, Porter has now gotten his toy gun out and is just shooting at the tv with that. Ugh. Even Dallin worries about shooting zombies now. They came up with a plan the other day to escape if zombies came. It basically was to sacrifice me to the zombies while they ran away with Dad (because he is strong and runs fast and could get them away from the zombies while the zombies are busy eating me).

the standoff continues

Porter and Joe are still at odds about the training-wheeless bike. When I came home from work tonight, Joe was riding his bike around in circles in front of the house. Porter's bike was on the lawn, untouched. Joe did tricks, Porter watched and laughed but refused to get on his own bike. Joe tried bribing. He told Porter that he would get him the pack of motorcycles that Porter has his eye on if Porter would try riding his bike. Porter said no. Joe threatened. He said that he would never buy Porter the motorcycles, that they wouldn't even look at the motorcycles in the store if Porter wouldn't ride his bike. Porter said okay and continued to play with his toy cars. Joe explained repeatedly that Porter would never get the motorcycles. Porter casually continued to decline. I couldn't keep myself from laughing. Joe thought I was laughing at Porter's stubborness. I wasn't.

Dallin calls the other kids at daycare, "my kids," as in "her not nice to my kids" or "my kids play in dirt." It is very cute.

bathtime, bikes, and Peter and the Wolf

Last night I had the boys take a bath together for time-saving purposes. I usually make them bathe separately now because they (a) try to drown each other, (b) fight over who gets sit in a certain spot, or (c) have lengthy conversations about their private parts and try to touch each other. Additionally, Porter now likes privacy in the bathroom and has told me to "never ever come into the bathroom while he is taking a bath" and Dallin still needs to be supervised. Anyway, while they were taking their bath, they decided to do that "criss cross applesauce" thing on their backs that I taught them. It was very cute. Dallin gets so excited he can hardly stand it. He starts wiggling and giggling while Porter is doing his back and when it is his turn to do Porter, he usually laughs so hard that he can't finish. Dallin is generally very giggly. Joe just has to threaten to tickle him and Dallin will start laughing so hard that he falls over.

Every morning, Porter has started telling me that he is too sick to go to daycare, church, etc. I decided to tell him the story of Peter and the Wolf this morning and explain that when you constantly complain about something that isn't true, people don't believe you when it really does happen. Porter and Dallin were very interested in the story but when I explained what it meant and asked if they understood, they got bogged down in other issues such as, was Peter a grown up and if not, why was he allowed to be alone with the sheep; how Peter was not Porter and so the story is not about Porter; and did Peter get to pet the sheep. Hmm. Speaking of sheep, we went to the petting zoo briefly yesterday because Dallin really wanted to. Two of the baby sheep appeared to be twins. They walked around together, laid down together, drank water together, etc. Porter said that he wanted to be a twin and now he is upset with me for not making him a twin. Dallin said that he wants a baby goat now for a pet.

Joe took the training wheels off Porter's bike. Porter doesn't like it this way. Joe thinks he is old enough to learn to ride without training wheels (I disagree but that is another story). Porter now refused to ride his bike until Joe puts the training wheels back on. They are both very stubborn about this. I wonder who will win. Even though Joe has tried to compel Porter to ride without the training wheels, I have said that Porter doesn't have to and so he doesn't.

Last night Porter told me that married people kiss lips but that it is disgusting and they should only kiss on the cheeks. He thinks kissing and hugging is disgusting lately. Dallin pays lip service to Porter's beliefs but still goes around kissing (and licking) everyone. He always asks to kiss Afton when he sees her.

highlights

I took the boys to the Children's museum on thursday and Porter brought his friend Gavin. It was mostly a good time, though it was really crowded. These are some of the highlights:
(1) I was trying to watch everyone at the same time and at one point realized that I couldn't see Dallin. I look around for a minute and couldn't find him. I gathered up Porter and Gavin and we looked harder for Dallin and still couldn't find him. We went to the front desk to report him missing. While I was talking with guy at the front counter, giving him a description of Dallin, etc., Dallin came running up to me, happy as could be. He said he wanted a toy. It seems he had been hanging out in the giftshop, looking for something for himself and didn't consider himself lost.
(2) on the way home, Gavin was telling Porter about wrestling with his dad. I am a little sketchy on the details, but apparently Gavin and his brother were hiding under a blanket when their dad came and scared them. It was pretty funny. Gavin then asked Porter what his dad did. Porter said, "he just hurts me until I cry." Gavin said, "oh" and launched into a new story. Before anyone calls social services, be assured that Joe doesn't actually really hurt Porter. Porter just doesn't like to wrestle and gets all worked up. If Joe pins him, Porter will cry until his lips turns blue and he starts yelling that he is choking. If Joe covers Porter with a blanket, Porter will freak out and cry again. Porter especially hates to be tickled (I understand, I too hate to be pinned down and tickled). Granted, I think that Joe should just let him go instead of harassing him further, but Porter gets himself into it, since he always initiates the wrestling. Anyway, I have been laughing to myself about Porter's response for days now.